Beer cocktails provide creative alternatives to the hard alcohol ban on the Hill
It’s no secret that the College’s hard alcohol ban has been less than wildly successful over the past year; we’re just too classy to give up our cocktail parties. But never fear. I’ve recently come across a genius solution to our alcohol problem, and we can still put the little black dresses to use: beer cocktails.
The idea developed when I noticed that my apartment refrigerator’s vegetable drawer had been filled with leftover Natural Light from a party we hosted a couple of months ago. Since none of my roommates actually like it (does anyone?), it had been sitting there untouched for quite some time while our greens wilted on the middle shelf. Beer cocktails were the perfect solution. I know, anything with Natty lacks a certain amount of classiness; add some mixers, however, and voilà, instant elegance. Your liver, your wallet and Dean Terhune will thank you if you put the vodka back on the shelf.
I’ve compiled a small collection of simple beer cocktail recipes below, along with a zero to 10 scale of drinkability for each. Anything above six, I would consider paying money for at a bar. Between three and five, I may drink if it were the only thing around. Below three, I’d rather die of thirst.
The Shandy Drinkability: 8 1 cup light beer 1 cup ginger beer
Apparently this drink dates back to the 19th century. The ginger beer provides a nice punch, and the spiciness is reminiscent of summertime. Try it with sparkling cider instead of ginger beer for a Cider Shandy.
The Michelada Drinkability: 1 1 cup light beer 2 splashes Worcestershire Sauce 3 splashes lime juice 3 drops hot sauce
Surprisingly, this is one of the most common beer cocktails that I found a recipe for. It’s pretty revolting: savory, sour and salty. Somehow, all of the ingredients seem to cancel each other out and the end result is something that tastes like pickle juice. I happen to like pickles, hence the one drinkability point. One of my taste-testing roommates declared it “the most disgusting thing” she’s ever tasted. The smell is quite rancid.
Beermosa Drinkability: 7 1 cup light beer 1 cup orange juice
A classic: the hangover and the cure, all in one drink. It’s faintly bubbly and packed with vitamin C. Add an orange slice if you want to dress it up.
Bubbly Brew Drinkability: 5 1 cup light beer ¾ cup champagne
Perhaps the classiest of all not-so-classy beer cocktails. I think this one would be better with a darker beer if you have it on hand, but it’s not so bad with a cheap light one either.
Poor Girl’s Salty Dog Drinkability: 8 1 cup light beer 1 cup grapefruit juice Sea salt rimmed glass
My personal favorite. I prefer it without the salt, but then it feels wrong to call it a Salty Dog. This drink is light, crisp and refreshing; perfect for warm afternoons or chilly evenings spent wishing spring break would come sooner.